As a family, we want to put together a book of memories and photos of Lorraine to have as a keepsake. Whether you are a friend, family member, former co-worker, ward member, neighbor, etc we'd love it if you'd like to participate! The more submissions the better, and it'd be great to hear from all walks of life! We will be compiling these entries along with photos in an album that will be printed and cherished forever!
So think about...
What fun memories do you have with Lorraine?
How has she been an influence to you?
What lessons has she taught you?
Or simply, what message would you like to share with her?
It has been so uplifting hearing from individuals that have visited her on what an impact she's had on them, the fun memories they've shared, or memories of certain holiday traditions,etc. It is those things that we'd love to have written down so we can all remember them.
To participate, please email your message and/or photo to lorraineslegacy@gmail.com
Please submit by October 10th.
Thank you in advance for taking time to submit a message & make this book possible!
September was a whirlwind month for Lur (and all of us). After nearly two weeks at the Avalon rehab center, she was forced to go home (without going into all the dramatic details, the insurance company found her fit to go home and stopped paying for her rehab stay)! Randy had less than 24 hours to figure out how she would now be cared for at home 24/7! She had made little progress at Avalon and still needed assistance with pretty much everything! Hospice was called-in and supplied her with a bed and made a few adjustments to the home to ensure a safer and more pleasant stay. The relief society immediately stepped-up and organized volunteers to come every day and help administer medications and address any of her needs. It was pretty miraculous how it all came together so quickly and seamlessly!
Physically, Lur was in a very bad state at this point and we all thought the end was very near. She had made little progress since the hospital and her mouth sores and eye ulcers made it difficult for us to look at her without thinking of all the pain she must be in. She still hardly would eat or drink because it was just too painful. We met as a family and discussed many important needs and things we could do as a family. Immediate household needs were talked about. Future needs and funeral plans were discussed. It was a very emotionally-charged meeting. After we met, we all went to the house to surprise her and welcomed her home. We presented her with our recent family picture, framed and ready to hang above her new bed. It was such an emotional night for all us, seeing her so physically week and not knowing what the weeks ahead would entail.
Together, and through must fasting and prayer, Randy and Lorraine decided to stop chemotherapy. It was a very difficult decision, but simply put, the very thing she needs, she can't have. Would we rather see her die from chemo or cancer? Quality of life is what she (and all of us) want. Whatever timeframe that is...
Looking back now, it was a blessing in disguise she was forced home. Chemo was stopped and has left her body. Everyday she's gaining more strength, eating more, and become more herself again! Her mouth sores are nearly healed and her eye ulcers are gone. She just looks and sounds so much better! It's been so wonderful to see her that way. It's been too long. Home truly has been healing for her.
She is still on Hospice and has volunteers come into the home twice a day. As a family, we fill-in the cracks and help a lot on the weekends. She still needs assistance getting in/out of the bed or couch, restroom, bathing, etc. Her poor body still does not have the strength to do it on its own. So we just pray she will get stronger and enjoy her time at home.
As a family, we have been OVERWHELMED will the outpouring of love, service, visits, prayers, and kind gestures for our family. How can we possibly thank everyone? Just know our family appreciates everything everyone is doing for our family. We feel it. We need it. Prayers are what are keeping us going. We truly are buoyed up and strengthend through everyone's faith. So thank you!
It's been hard keeping this blog updated with all the changes the past few weeks. Change is the only thing that's constant with Lur's health right now. As a family, we feel like we're on a roller coaster ride every week. Sometimes she's up and feeling good and gaining strength and we have hope and faith she's going to kick this cancer in the butt. Sometimes she's down and in a hospital bed fighting to just stand on her own two feet... and our hope and faith are tested.
She was admitted into the hospital August 24th. We had celebrated her 62nd birthday over the weekend prior and she just wasn't doing well. She was so weak she could hardly even eat her own birthday cake! Her white blood count was very low and she had early signs of pneumonia. After five days in the hospital, with many doses of antibiotics and three bags of blood, she was transferred to Avalon rehab center where she currently resides. The rehab center acts as a transitional care facility between hospital and home. Here she will work on gaining strength to be able to come home.
Like I said, it's a roller coaster ride. Sometimes it's daily, sometimes it's even hourly. One minute we're celebrating how great she looks and how well she's communicating and acting. The next minute we're crying at her slurred speech, complete physical dependence on others, and ache for her strength and optimism to return. She's trying to stay positive, but she's discouraged with how slow her recovery is taking her this go around. It seems as though her bad days are outnumbering the good more and more.
So for now, we'll celebrate the good days when they come along...
We want to thank all of her neighbors, friends, ward members, etc. who have sent cards, notes, brought gifts/flowers/signs to her room, etc... It's been so uplifting seeing her surrounded by so much love and support.
After 2.5 weeks of radiation, Lur's hair began to drastically fall out. The first time around during her breast cancer chemotherapy, it was a different experience. She was accepting of it and looked forward to her journey ahead with confidence and optimism. This time around, during her brain cancer radiation, it's been different. She was told radiation might cause more permanent hair loss. She didn't want to see those curly grey locks go. She's also feeling much more run-down at this stage. All of this has made losing her hair again so much harder.
Allie and I took her to our "hair girl" JaNae. Lur wanted to give her the opportunity of buzzing it. Lur has loved the relationship and conversations she's had with JaNae over the years. It was as if she was telling her "thank you" and "goodbye." Bitter sweet indeed.
We're all use to her bald head though, so it wasn't as drastic of a change this time. Plus I feel like it makes her look younger and her smile brighter! Bald and beautiful for sure.
Way to live strong mom. Keep fighting! -Katie
See the video of the first time we shaved her head...
The gracious and talented Lauren Taylor photographed our family while we were all together over the 4th of July. It was emotional at times, knowing it could be our last family photos with mom in them. Hopefully there will be many more in the future, but these ones will hold a special place in our hearts.
My dear friend Jentrie Williams offered to do my mom's makeup for this photo shoot (and she kindly did mine too). My mother looked stunning! Thank you for your kindness Jen! She felt beautiful.
The dust has settled quite a bit since the initial news that cancer spread to Lur's brain. We had a wonderful 4th of July weekend! Ryan's family came into town and we enjoyed every minute all together (dinners, drive-in movie, Kaysville parade, swimming, fireworks, and family pictures). Everyone was worn out (especially Lur), but it was a good worn out. The weekend was exactly what we all needed and it renewed our strength and determination to fight and support her through this next battle.
So on Monday July 6th, Lur had a positron emission tomography (PET) scan performed on her entire body. Since her breast cancer had traveled to her brain, her oncologist was concerned the cancer may have spread other places.
As a family, we were anxious all week to hear the results of the scan. We kept calling and texting throughout the week to see if she had heard anything. Lur's mood and mindset had shifted since the holiday weekend and she was in great spirits about everything. So, she delayed calling the radiologist because, quite frankly, who wants to hear more bad news? So finally, on Friday the 10th, she received the news that cancer had spread to her liver and there are some suspicious lymph nodes in her stomach area.
She took the time to call all of us kids with the news. She was calm, upbeat, and refreshingly optimistic. I didn't even cry hearing it. The thought, "Come what may and love it," entered my mind over and over again. She made hearing the news not seem like such a tragedy. Maybe we've all cried ourselves dry, but it wasn't devastating hearing the news this time around.
So, she will finish her brain radiation treatments next week. They will do a follow-up MRI scan 7-8 weeks after her final treatment to see how she responded. Fingers crossed radiation puts it into remission and stops growth.
After radiation is finished, she will begin an oral chemotherapy drug for her liver. According to her oncologist, the drug is a lot easier on the body and there shouldn't be as many side effects as her previous IV-administered chemotherapy.
So for now we take it week by week. Last week she was doing great and we all felt peace with the new news. This week has been harder. Radiation side effects are starting to manifest themselves (extreme exhaustion, loss of appetite, inability to complete tasks, etc.). Pair this with a bad fall in her bathroom the other day, she's been "knocked down" most of the week.
But we feel strengthened by so many people's prayers and concern. God truly is aware of Lorraine and our family at this time. It's this knowledge that strengthens us to move forward. He's sent so many tender mercies and "angels" our way throughout this journey. Although it's not always easy, we trust in the Lord and His timing. We take each day, each week, and each challenge with a "come what may and love it" attitude. We'll celebrate the good days and pray for strength on the hard days.
Randy & Lorraine met with the Oncologist today to discuss the plan going forward.
Last Thursday after the MRI determined that the cancer has spread to her brain, she was given a strong steroid to reduce the swelling and help alleviate the pain. She is to take this steroid every 4-6 hours. Since Thursday, she hasn't had bad headaches, nausea, or throwing up. What a blessing!
The Oncologist believes it was possible that there were cancer cells in her brain back in January when she had some seizure episodes, although nothing showed up on the MRI done in January.
It is unknown at this point if the cancer is spreading at a rapid pace, but what we do know is that it has had to spread quickly since January til now to show up all over her brain. The brain cancer is not contained in one area, in which surgery is not an option right now. They did find 7 larger tumors (1-1.9cm) throughout her cerebrum and cerebellum, with several other smalls ones throughout her brain.
She will begin radiation on her brain on Wednesday, July 1st. Note: they are canceling her last 4 radiation treatments to treat breast cancer, because that is not their priority now. She will be doing her treatments at Davis Hospital. She will undergo 15 radiation treatments over the course of 3 weeks. She will lose her hair again, which may be more permanent because of the targeted radiation area.
Next week they will also do a PET Scan (positron emission tomography) of her whole body to see if cancer has possibly spread anywhere else. The oncologist is confident, she'll be in the clear.
As you can imagine, these past few days have been devastating news to our family. Mom & Dad have received Priesthood Blessings, some family members were able to attend the Temple, and we had a special family Fast on Sunday. We have felt of your prayers. We are truly grateful for your support! We're thankful for the visits, flowers, dinners, phone calls, etc you have shown to our family at this time.
We will be having a special family Fast for Lorraine this Sunday, June 28th. We welcome all those that would like to join us. Thank you for your support.
Lorraine was diagnosed with Stage 2/3 Breast Cancer on June 20, 2014. At the time of diagnosis, they did not have insurance coverage, as her husband was out of work. Randy (her husband) was offered a new job with insurance benefits just two months after she was diagnosed. Prior to this, Lorraine had been in tune with the spirit and followed a prompting to sign up for an AFLAC supplemental cancer policy just 6 weeks before she was diagnosed. We have seen many tender mercies since that time. The tumor in her left breast was about 7cm, in which doctors thought it'd be best to start Chemo to try and shrink the tumor first. Over the course of the last year, she has undergone 16 chemo treatments including "the devils cocktail." A few short weeks after Chemo had finished, she began to have other complications. She was admitted to the ICU for 5 days. She had pneumonia, sepsis in one lung, very low blood pressure, her kidneys were failing, and her white blood count was almost 0. On March 2nd, she went in for her double mastectomy and spent 3 days in the hospital recovering. On May 20th (her husbands birthday) she began radiation. She was to complete 28 sessions of radiation. The last 2 weeks she hasn't been feeling real well. She has been nauseous, weak, and throwing up. We thought originally it was the flu, then possibly dehydration. It was going on too long. Her radiologist suggested they get an MRI scan of her brain. June 25, 2015 we got the results. She now has Brain Cancer. She was just 5 days away from being done with the treatments for Breast Cancer (besides reconstructive surgery), only to be brought more heart wrenching news. Throughout this year, she has been a woman of faith and strength. She has never asked "Why Me?" She is a light and an example to all those she comes in contact with. She has always put others before herself, even amidst the hardest times in her life. This trial has taken a toll emotionally, physically, and financially. As a way to Pay it Forward and help alleviate as much stress and worry, we are asking for your help! Thank you! Donations can be made by going tohttp://www.gofundme.com/teamlur
I wanted to share some personal thoughts as I reflect on this past year and all that I have gone through with my cancer journey. On June 4, 2014 I went in for a routine mammogram, but had some concerns about a very obvious lump I had felt. After the exam, I was immediately escorted into the on sight radiologist to review my results. He said there were four suspicious spots (and it wasn't a family history of cysts) He said the only way to find out for sure, was to do a biopsy. We had a two week period, during which we took a short trip to see our granddaughter, Brooklyn get baptized and enjoy our time with Ryan & Rachelle's family. I was worried and did alot of research on the computer. My biopsy was June 19 and that is a story by itself how they do the test. On Friday, June 20th at about 9:40 a.m. I got the infamous phone call confirming that I had breast cancer. I called Randy and my kids, shared the news with co-workers and ward members later and started what would become a year plus long journey. It is a very humbling experience when you are facing your mortality in the face. I might add that at the time, Randy was out of work and we had not had insurance for 2 1/2 yrs (first time in our married life). Randy was offered a new job with super insurance benefits just two months after I was diagnosed. As we started this journey, we were given so many "tender mercies", discounts and blessings. Just six weeks before I was diagnosed, I had signed up for an AFLAC supplemental cancer policy because there was so much cancer in my family. What a blessing to be eligible for that and the financial benefits to help with my care. We were also eligible for a $4,000 genetic test that confirmed several weeks later, that I HAD NOT inherited from my parents the BRCA 1 or BRCA 2 gene or the gene for colon cancer. It was a huge blessing to my kids, especially my girls. With the history of cancer in my family it was welcomed news!! The week after my diagnosis, I met with a team of three doctors. My oncologist, my general surgeon and my radiologist. They each explained my planned care. There were lots of tears but never anger or why me? but I tried to keep a positive attitude and sense of humor. On July 10th I had my port put in for my chemo treatment which would be first up because of the size of the tumor 7 cm (about 3-5 in.) On July 18th, I started my first chemo treatment which was a long day and knew that each Friday I would be receiving the first 12 of my treatments and then 4 additional ones some times called the "devils cocktail" because they are so toxic!! I made the weekly trip to Salt Lake and sometimes more often due to complications. When I started this journey, I purchased a hot pink golf shirt and had my kids, grand kids, doctors, nurses and others sign my shirt. It is a fun reminder of all those who have helped in my care.I started losing my hair after 2-3 treatments, so in August my kids and grand kids and Randy shaved my head. Katie made a fun video of the occasion. I had already shopped for a wig and so started wearing hats, scarves and my cute new wig. Randy, my girls, Matt all helped me clear until December 5th when I was done with chemo!! My family came to help celebrate that final day, my girls wore their pink shirts, I got to ring the bell (for last chemo-Ring the Bell, Run Like Hell) brought balloons, flowers and a banner to run through leaving the building. I grew to love my doctor, his physician assistant and the nurses and others who helped me through this first phase.
Its good you forget about the bad days and bad times and are just grateful to be alive! Just a week after my last chemo, I was not feeling good to all. Allie made an un-expected visit to my oncologist office to get hydrated. I had fallen several times getting out of the shower and getting dressed (because I was so weak). The weekend did not get any better. Sunday night my two sisters came to visit me and said to Randy, " I really think you need to take her to emergency" We didn't, but Monday Randy called the doctor and was told to get me to Emergency at St. Marks Hospital NOW. I didn't know how sick I really was. I had more doctors /nurses working on me, was transferred later to ICU and spent five days in the hospital. Randy had been busy calling the kids and saying, "I don't know if Mom is going to make it" and being told by the doctor in the emergency room when Randy asked if my wife is going to be OK, he replied, " I hope so." Ryan called from Montana and said, "You aren't going to die on me Mom are you?" I said . "I hope not." I found out that I had pneumonia, sepsis in one lung, low low blood pressure, my kidneys were failing,my white blood count was almost 0 and other problems. WOW!! When I came home from the hospital on December 20th, my Christmas was all up, shopping was done (I planned ahead) and was put on quarantine for at least two weeks and got lots of pills. Because of my unexpected hospital visit, my double mastectomy surgery and starting radiation was delayed. I used my time to get my strength up, quit my job on February 6th and prepared for surgery on March 2. I had my double mastectomy (as a preventative) and spent 3 days in the hospital. I went from being a "well-endowed" over 60 woman to the profile of a 7th grader. It feels so good. When I had the four drains, after a week, removed from my body it was such a relief. The next phase was tissue expanders put in during surgery, to prepare for the radiation and re-construction. I met with my plastic surgeon once a week for 8 weeks to insert fluid to stretch my skin.I started radiation of May 20th, Randy's 65th birthday. I was scheduled for 28 treatments, Monday-Friday 5 times a week for 5 1/2 weeks!! I only have seven left and will so be grateful for June 30 to come. I haven't had any side effects so far, and the treatments are only about 10 minutes in the Tomography radiation machine. I am glad to be close to home by Davis Hospital so I didn't have to drive so far. After my treatment is over, I will have to wait 6-8 weeks to heal and then final re-construction surgery. My plastic surgeon will make me a new woman!! I get to choose the size I want to be. Allie found me a shirt that says "Of course their fake, the real ones tried to kill me!!!"
I have learned so much from this journey so far. I am not done yet. I have learned to be a receiver from all those who want to offer service. I have learned prayer works. Whether it is in your home, church, temple or wherever I have felt it. I have received so much advice, counsel, books, phone calls, meals brought in, treats at my door,anonymous cards and even a pink Christmas tree with angels from my breast cancer survivor neighbor. I have appreciated priesthood blessings, sometimes in the middle of the night when I was coughing so bad I couldn't sleep. I have more fully appreciated my family, friends, co-workers and ward family.
When I had my seizures in January, I could not drive for three months (even though I rebelled a little at the end). I had to rely on family, friends, neighbors to take me to appointments. Sometimes I even got a ride AND a free lunch and a chance to visit.
I had an opportunity to participate in the Susan Komen Race for the Cure in May and walked (not ran) a 5K and had my family supporting me and share the event with breast cancer survivors (Judy Hill and Arvonne Newton).
I am sharing this story today,because it was one year ago June 20, I got the dreaded phone call that the "C" word had come into my life. I've tried to stay positive,keep my sense of humor and try to learn from this experience.I have shared hugs and tears with some I just met, and with those who are going through cancer themselves and gained a new compassion for their struggle. I mentioned earlier that my hot pink golf shirt was used to record signatures of those who helped me along the way. So,,, from my oncologist, "I am the one who made you sick!! from my general surgeon, " I am the one who made you flat!! and from my plastic surgeon, "I am the one who will fill you up!! Haven't had my radiologist sign my shirt yet... but I will.
On another thought... I lost my hair, I lost my boobs and I lost 44 lbs. Heck of a way to do it!
